This is exactly the sort of mood I'm in...

gimme...

Taken from a messenger conversation earlier tonight:



that film could have been made for me, tons of monsters with tentacles and a big old soppy demon who smokes all the time and says 'oh crap' alot



In case you are unfamiliar with the above image, or your not sure what 'big old soppy demon' I'm talking about I've been watching the new region 1 Hellboy DVD.



It's fantastic, right up there with X-men and Spiderman in the comic book adaption stakes. For the uninitiated Hellboy tells the story of a demon inadvertently summoned to our world through a Nazi ritual at the end of World War II, the ritual is disrupted by American troops who find Hellboy and raise him to be part of a shadowy government agency called the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defence. Sort of like the x-files but with a big red demon instead of Mulder, whose best friend is a fish... oh, and he has a thing for a pyrokinetic girl... and there is a clockwork Nazi... and Rasputin is in there too.



It's really difficult to describe to someone who hasn't read the books, without sounding like I'm making it up! Still, I loved it, the main characters are spot on, all the monsters are straight out of the big bumper book of H P Lovecraft nightmares, and Ron Perlman does a brilliant job in the Hellboy makeup managing to actually be quite touching in places.



For the life of me I can't understand why it's taking so long to be shown in the cinemas over here.

If this post had a soundtrack then I think the first song would be Dismantle Me by The Distillers as frankly my body seems to have given up with me. It clearly needs to be taken apart and given a good service by a team of qualified mechanics before being put back together.



Anyway, getting ahead of myself again. Went to the Staines Regatta yesterday, which I have to say was a very pleasant way to spend a Saturday Afternoon, helped some what by the weather being really good. I did start getting 'beer envy' halfway through the afternoon (as yours truly was driving), but soon made up for that when we got back to Woking - hence my current physical state.



I managed a few pictures by the river, but no pictures whilst in Woking - far too busy catching up it would seem.

Couple of gigs I'm going to which may be of interest:



Sonic Youth, 2nd September at the Brixton Academy. Tickets are available here.



!!!, 13th October at the Astoria. Tickets for that one are here.

Mid-afternoon film review time, as staring at database tables is driving me fiucking insane...



Spiderman 2

Obviously brilliant: a bit darker than the original film as Peter Parker starts to question whether he can handle the responsibility of being Spiderman and hence let's things around him slide a bit. Dr Ock was an awesome villain even if he did go a bit wet at the end. Best bit's: anything involving a fight between Spidey and Dr Ock, and any scene with Jonah Jameson (Peter Parker's editor). Worst bit's: not much really: the web-swinging CGI Spidey still looks a bit fake to me, and maybe he spent a little too much time with his mask off.



Around the world in 80 days

Not as bad as I thought it was going to be, they've basically turned it into a fairly jolly Jackie Chan action film, so there are plenty of stunts to enjoy if you get bored of the fairly lightweight story.



Walking Tall

Story is as follows: The Rock comes back to his hometown to find it full of drugs and questionable characters, The Rock gets his ass kicked in a casino, The Rock kicks ass back, the film ends. Slightly more entertaining than watching the Sunday afternoon Eastender's omnbus.

If you have been near a PC recently and have a healthy interest in computer games you may have heard of a fairly obscure little game called Doom 3 ;-)



Well, the official requirements have been released, what you'll need is:



1.5Ghz P4 chip or AMD Athlon 1500

384Mb of RAM

2Gb of hard drive space.

An nVidia GeForce 3 or ATI 8500 graphics card



Which basically means my un-upgradable laptop can (allegedly) run it - although having said that I don't think that the PC needed to run it with all the graphical goodies turned on has been built yet...



Still, nice to know that I now have the option of buying the PC version.

Well I think the website is beginning to settle in nicely: the CD collection section is up to date, I've transferred all the bookmarks from my laptop into the new portable bookmark section (I recommend the mp3blog links to the music lovers, and the gadgets section to the geeks), and you now have smilies to play with in the comments if you can work out how to use them.



I'm still a bit dissatisfied about some of the graphics, but overall I think it's an improvement. Any constructive comments on the new design will be welcome (negative ones will be treated with the contempt they deserve!).



Anyway, let me get back to trying a proper post - I may even try not to go on about music like I normally do. ;-)



I've been trying to quit smoking again, third time now (I count an attempt to quit smoking as making it through 24 hours without a ciggy). Once again I seem to have failed...



I think the reason is I don't seem to be able to accept that being nicotine free is a benefit. OK, I'd have some extra cash, but I know I'd only blow this on CD binges and videogames that I'd never finish. The short term health benefits have a certain amount of appeal, but I don't think I do enough exercise to feel the benefit. As for long term health benefits: well, since the male side of my family seem to be genetically predetermined to self destruct at the age of 50 (at 30 I'm the oldest living male relation on my Father's side - a pretty scary thought at times) I find it difficult to see that giving up smoking would help there.



Of course these arguments are all a load of crap, the truth is there are three ways I'm going to give up: it gets banned, I wake up and stop believing the above shite, or (and this is a long shot) I meet someone who is going to give me a reason to change...



Another reason I'm still smoking is the band I'm going to see in a couple of weeks time (I knew that not going on about music wasn't going to last). This is Justin Broadrick formerly the brains behind Godflesh, now recording as Jesu:

A fairly pleasant looking chap standing in a field of flowers, however he's responsible for some of the most emotionally draining music you will ever hear (listen to the samples over here if you feel brave). Not the sort of stuff to be approach lightly, and frankly the thought of putting myself through such an experiance nicotine free is not one I can contemplate at the moment.

I'll quit after I see them play though - honest...

Saturday's Impulse Buys



Arthur Russell - Calling out of Context

Arthur Russell was a ridiculously prolific New York cellist (there are apparently hundreds of his tapes left unreleased) who may or may not been the missing link between disco or house music, he also made some charmingly melancholic tunes with just his voice, heavily processed cello and minimal extra instrumentation which this CD showcases. It's kind of depressing to listen to as your left with the feeling that if he was born a decade or two later the world would have been more able to accept his music. Still, what he left behind after his death is well worth exploring and I recommend this CD to anyone after something to soundtrack lazy Sunday mornings after a busy Saturday night of partying.



Isis - Mosquito Control EP

I tend to think of Isis as a heavy metal version of Mogwai, one of those bands who are not afraid to show there 'post rock' tendencies. This is an early release of theres, but none the less still far more mature than any metal band I care to name. Crushingly powerful, but still with qualities of beauty in places. They have a couple of remix EPs doing the round and a new CD coming out in a couple of months - I can't wait for that.



Murcof - Utopia

Mexican ambient music anyone? How about some classical music influence minimal house music? Honestly it's really good. This CD features remixes from his previous album Martes along with some epic new pieces. Really good intelligent electronica which I'm glad to welcome into my CD collection

It has been brought to my attention on more than one occasion, that this site has been getting a bit shit...



Naturally my first reaction to this has been one of stifled outrage (it's a good job my laser beam eyes don't work at the moment). However once the red mist has cleared I can't help but to find myself agreeing that this site has got itself stuck in a rut. And what's the best way for a website to get out of a rut?



The obvious answer is of course: Porn, and lots of it. But unfortunately I lack the webspace and bandwidth to do justice to the subject. Nope, I think the best way is a good old fashioned redesign - so here it is: darthphil.com version whatever.



The content is basically the same, however: I've moved the credit card stress testing section into it's own page (I should get rid of it, but the obsessive compulsive in me feels the need to make lists of all the DVDs, CDs and videogames I'd like to buy - getting rid of it could cause serious psychological trauma); I've made a bookmarks page, this is where I'm going to post all the vaguely interesting links I find, rather than sticking random links on the main page; and for the geeks amongst you the whole site has been mozilla'ed up (so it should work in Firefox now) - oh, and each section has its own Atom format XML feed for anyone using an RSS Reader.



Hopefully the redesign will inspire some half decent posts...

Updated the CD bit...

mix CDs and a little loungecore



DJ /rupture - 58.46 Radio Mix

Hmm this is a little bit worrying, I'm starting to get a bit bored of rupture's mix CDs - I'm just not being surprised anymore, the formula is too predictable: Take one part ragga toasting, add some middle east vibes, mix with some noise and throw in one or two modern rnb tunes - dead easy really. I think I'd like to hear him do something different now.



Amon Tobin - Solid Steel

This is a bit more interesting, a mix recorded live where Amon Tobin uses a software/hardware package to link two timestamped vinyl 12 inches to a computer storing all the songs digitally - this allows for an interesting mix of digital and analogue mixing techniques. Putting the geekiness (in a good way) of the whole mix to one side and just having a listen to the tunes it's damn good stuff - nice and dark, very Amon Tobin and he finishes with a bad ass mix of Venus in Furs, which does me nicely.



Richard Cheese and Lounge Against the Machine - Tuxicity

Sometimes you just need to hear a cheesy lounge singer scream 'GOD I WANT TO FUCK HER!' in the middle of a cover version of Britney Spears's Crazy... A joke album, but they do it well and know when to shut the fuck up.

*cough* Bit Torrent *cough* Google

Well Shrek 2 gets the Darth Phil seal of approval, not too different to the original but still funny - especially Antonio Banderas as Puss in Boots.



And it seems that Doom 3 does exist, they've actually finished it, and it's apparently quite good. Being the heathen that I am I'll be waiting for the XBox version, although this could be more to do with the fact that my laptop probably hasn't got a hope in hell of running it.

Right, what do we have here? Well, this is the latest addition to Ninjatune's Solid Steel series of mix CDs, this one is from the seriously talented Amon Tobin.



For this mix he used a bit of software called Final Scratch which apparently links time encoded vinyl to PC based samples - which is nice, I guess? Anyway, lot's of nice complicated beats, bass samples that could rip your face off and lush cinematic samples to lull you into false sense of security before going all darkside on you.



Lovely!

Half-Life 2 specs revealed



Well, looks like I'll be able to play Half life 2 on my laptop, assuming it ever gets released of course.

Note to self, when it gets to the point in the evening when you are too drunk to hold a pint of beer, then it is time to go home. Pictures of people drinking and being drunk can be found here and here.



The CDs pictured here are a new(ish) mix CD from DJ /rupture, more three deck ragga influenced nonsense, sounds OK although in my opinion the first track (Aalyiah over a dub reggae track) doesn't seem to work very well. It does improve though, and it is a recording of a live set so I'll forgive him this time.



As for the other CD, well it can be hard work listening to depressing rock, snobby hip-hop and glitchy electronica. Sometimes I just want to listen to something thats going to put a smile on my face. Well, Richard Cheese does the job quite nicely - he specialises in doing lounge style cover versions of heavy metal and dodgy hip hop tunes, and he does a cover of Britney Spear's Crazy which has been making me giggle all weekend... But then again I am easily amused.

Big Songs For Little Attention Spans



Sorry to go on about music all the time, but I think this is worth pointing out to the world in gerneral - a compilation of 100 songs to fit onto a normal 80 minute CD. It's actually pretty good: obviously mainly punky stuff as these type of songs lend themselves to the sub one minute track length quite well, a few joke songs, and a few surprises. And it has my favourite Lolita Storm song ever: Hot Lips, Wet Pants - marvellous...

If I was the sort of person to download albums off P2P networks weeks before they are officially released, I'd probably avoid the 'new' (I use the term loosely) Prodigy album - unless the thought of listening to a dozen different versions of 'Smack my Bitch Up' gets you all warm and tingly.



However I'd probably be nurturing the leaked Interpol album until the time came to buy a proper copy, as it's a bit good - apparently.

I don't normally have much time for personality quizzes, they are a bit lazy when it comes to coming up with content for your website, but this one made me chuckle.



"You are an SEDF--Sober Emotional Destructive Follower. This makes you an evil genius. You are extremely focused and difficult to distract from your tasks. With luck, you have learned to channel your energies into improving your intellect, rather than destroying the weak and unsuspecting."



"Your friends may find you remote and a hard nut to crack. Few of your peers know you very well--even those you have known a long time--because you have expert control of the face you put forth to the world. You prefer to observe, calculate, discern and decide. Your decisions are final, and your desire to be right is impenetrable."



"You are not to be messed with. You may explode."



...mwah mwah mwaaah!

Fairly standard pictures from last night

I impressed myself yesterday with my ability to read a book in about an hour, and it wasn't a comic book! Although admitedly it wasn't exactly long: The Coma by Alex Garland, it's an interesting little short story about someone trying to wake up out of a Coma - I think it would make a very good film if Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind hadn't been made already.

Run for the hills! The geeks are starting to arm themselves!

Math Hardcore...



The Dillinger Escape Plan - Miss Machine Sampler

If you are aware of the website Epitonic.com you may be familiar with the term Math Rock, I'd put the Dillinger Escape Plan into this category except for the fact that they are much too loud and angry to be just called rock, so I'm calling it Math Hardcore. Incredibly complicated and intricate music performed using a fairly traditional bass/drums/guitars/vocal set up, I might get the album, but I'm not sure if I'm up to the task of keeping up with a band like this over a full length album - we shall see.